Vagina

Vagina Having a vagina is very useful. It's a great place to store things if they're pretty small and you don't mind them getting gooey, it fits in a pair of panties much more handily than external genitalia and putting things in it lends an instant "edge" to photos.

Seriously, I'm not kidding. I can't tell you how many times I've put up an art photo of me with something unusual stuffed in me to have it yield an instant flurry of, "How edgy!" comments

Once a photographer knows that you'll put something in you for a photo that's all you'll hear about. I have one photo that gets a lot of press by Aeric Meredith-Goujon where I've got a whole bunch of rubber tubing in there. I get comments like, "she's a bug with her guts coming out", "good Lord! He's turned you into a Play-Doh machine!", and "I'll never look at Twizzlers the same again."

I guarantee you that those photos will be the first thing I'll hear about when a photographer tells me he's seen my work and, "wants to do something erotic and edgy". I figure it must be an unwritten rule of photography, "If you find a model who will stick something up her you've got to ask her to stick something up her for you." I'm usually up for it if I think the shot has artistic merit and I like the photographer. Yes, I'm like that. I have to be comfortable with a person to put an object in my holiest of holies in front of them.

So anyway, at this point the fun things that I've stuck up my hooter in a non sexy way include; a mass of rubber tubing, a mirror (the photographer is shaving in it in the photo), a pacifier, a whole bunch of tiny robotic arms, a largeish steel sex toy that looked more like sculpture, a vaguely phallic sculpture in blown glass (here's what I was thinking, "please don't break, please don't break, please don't break") a soft pack, a barbie doll and the heel of a patent leather stiletto.

That photo of the stiletto is now in an erotic art gallery in Paris. Know why? Because it was edgy. I would never have gotten into that gallery if I hadn't put a shoe up me. So a vagina is super useful to have, it's my favorite place on my body to store things, although I'll never get the smell out of my coin purse.