On being laid off

Laid. The word is much more fun when it has to do with sex than with being fired. The temp agency I work for came back from the holidays with an email, "about the future of our company"

Hey look! It's the corporate version of, "baby, we have to talk."

Interlude, if you've just joined the party here's the deal. I took a job from a friend a few years ago when I returned to Richmond to finish my degree. I would help her by adding another web designer to her temp agency, she would help me by giving me a stable source of income I could rely on while I couldn't travel for modeling because I was taking classes three days a week. It was the perfect situation! I had a stable income and health insurance!

Oh health insurance. I'm going to miss you so.

Anyway. My job was web design and maintenance. Lots of small companies need a web person but can't afford to or have no need to have a person on staff full time. The agency would send me out to them and I would work howeverlong they needed me to. Usually they wanted someone to update or create their site and then didn't need me again. Some of my favorites (like the one where the boss commented frequently about my footwear being too sexy) wanted me once every few weeks to update the site, keep backups and/or do security updates. So that was what I did. We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

So this email. The company is being rolled into another, larger company that does similar stuff. I don't know whether the owners sold it or the other company offered to buy it or what. My friend left the company a few months ago so I can't pry the answer out of her with margaritas. The office I kept my stuff in will be closed by the end of January and the employees the boss negotiated to keep will be moving on to permanent positions in the larger company. The larger company already has its own web people so me and the other designey-type tech are outta there.

My boss was really nice about, "I'll try to keep you on however I can! All the former clients already know you and they'll want you to work on their sites." He says that he knows for certain I have one more website to finish and at least three hours of work a month for one client. The other design tech we have has already sent me an email asking if I'd like to work together doing freelance work "on the side".

Of course this all comes after I've found that I do -in fact- owe my college almost 6 grand and took out a loan for a new car. I'd gotten used to the stability of the day job, having some place to be every Monday and knowing that I'd most likely have at least three days of work in a paycheck at the end of the week. Not having to canvas up modeling jobs and travel all over the place was nice.

...But I was getting bored. Antsy, restless. It was hard to concentrate on anything so I stopped doing everything. I was falling behind in my website work and my modeling work. I was starting to resent the day job. Starting to feel boring.

Maybe this is good. Perhaps I can use the skills I learned in the day job to add structure and time management to my freelance modeling and do better at modeling this time around. Time to spread my wings and soar? (in a more controlled manner than last time) she adds, under her breath, picturing a dove sailing out over the valleys with a watch on one feather and a briefcase full of actuary tables in the opposite claw.

...Hm.

Well. Anyway! I think this is a good thing. I think I was getting distracted. Doing something because it was easy and felt like a grown up thing to do. It's time to take stock of what I really want to do and chart a new heading. I'm open to ideas!